Award Date

5-1-2025

Degree Type

Dissertation

Degree Name

Doctor of Philosophy (PhD)

Department

Educational Psychology, Leadership, and Higher Education

First Committee Member

Jonathan Hilpert

Second Committee Member

Stefani Relles

Third Committee Member

Lisa Bendixen

Fourth Committee Member

Iesha Jackson

Number of Pages

246

Abstract

This autoethnographic study examines my lived experiences navigating the U.S. education system as a Black girl becoming a Black woman. From an African-centered perspective (Asante, 1990) this study critiques how belonging and motivation are conceptualized through Eurocentric frameworks that lead to conceptual incarceration, epistemicide, and the miseducation of Black students. Using Blackgirl Autoethnography (Boylorn, 2016) and Intuitive Inquiry (Anderson, 2004; Romanyshyn, 2007), I constructed a Life Timeline (Bau, 2024) from archival artifacts, academic and medical records, personal journals, and conversations with family and educational mentors. This allowed for a deeper understanding of how institutional exclusion, religious indoctrination, and psychological misorientation shaped my understanding of identity, motivation, and belonging. Data were analyzed using The Soundtrack of My Life (Payton, 2023), functioning as a hermeneutic and analytical tool. Through lyrical interpretation, I examined how music gave voice to emotional truths, ancestral memory, and unspoken resistance. Findings reveal that institutional belonging often required fragmentation of self, while a true sense belonging emerged through (re) connection with self, my cultural heritage, and deep, soul work—most notably through an episode of psychosis reinterpreted as a spiritual awakening. This study calls for a (re)conceptualization of motivation and belonging as intuitive, communal, and rooted in African-centered onto-epistemologies. In doing so, it urges Educational Psychology to expand its frameworks to affirm the spiritual, emotional, and cultural dimensions of Black life.

Controlled Subject

African Americans--Education; Musical analysis

Disciplines

Educational Psychology

File Format

pdf

File Size

1562 KB

Degree Grantor

University of Nevada, Las Vegas

Language

English

Rights

IN COPYRIGHT. For more information about this rights statement, please visit http://rightsstatements.org/vocab/InC/1.0/

Available for download on Saturday, May 15, 2032


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